This blog post was updated on September 29, 2023.
If you want to get to know someone, travel with them. And if you already know that someone, whether it’s your best friend from college or a new friendship at work, you might think traveling with them is a great idea. You’ll all get along and want to do and see the same things.
However, travel can bring out the best and worst in people, making or breaking friendships in the process. If you’re toying with the idea of a group trip, here’s how to travel with friends — minus the unnecessary drama.
Use a Budgeting App
When money and friends mix, disaster sometimes follows. If you don’t have a budget plan in place before you go, you might face ruined friendships. It’s essential to be clear about who will pay for what and when. In the planning stages, be sure that everyone is open, honest, and comfortable with the total cost. For example, if one friend wants to stay at all 5-star hotels and another can only afford hostels, you’ll need to resolve this before hitting the road. If someone forgets to pay someone back, this can only lead to awkward encounters and, at times, broken friendships.
The good news is, modern technology has turned budgeting your trip into a breeze. You can use budgeting apps for a variety of different things on vacation. Rather than sifting through a handful of crumpled receipts to determine who owes what, apps like Splittr and Splitwise can do the heavy lifting for you. Both apps allow you to create a dedicated space where you and your friends can upload shared expenses and split the cost using digital payment platforms like Zelle and Venmo. If everyone agrees on the process beforehand, you’ll meet fewer financial surprises and hurt feelings.
Organize a Trip-Planning Meeting
If you’ve decided to go on a trip with friends, first you need to meet up to go over all the ideas and expectations. If you’re not all on the same page, things can head south before your trip gets off the ground. Avoid having one person take over in terms of planning where you’ll go, how you’ll get there, and where you’ll stay. If one friend makes all the decisions, this can lead to resentment and disappointment.
At your trip-planning meeting, everyone needs to lay out their ideas and expectations for the journey. If one friend wants to sit on the beach for five days and another wants to party the whole time, it’s better to know about these differences ahead of time. While planning your trip, you’ll also want to delegate. It’s important to recognize strengths and weaknesses and decide who should tackle what during the planning process.
Keep It Fair During the Actual Travel
Once you’ve laid out your budget and figured out where you’re going, the next step is to take the trip. Be sure to consider the actual travel component to their trip – the flights, the car travel, the train rides. If you’re taking a long flight with your friends, be sure someone isn’t stuck in the middle seat the entire time. If you have a long road trip, try and make sure all the driving doesn’t fall to one person. Switch off and switch seats. You don’t want one friend cranky upon arrival because they had to drive for 5 hours straight.
Don’t Be Too Easygoing…or Too Uptight
If you’re going to explore a destination with your gang, there’s always a friend who has a strong opinion on what to do, a friend who has a strong opinion on what not to do, and usually a few caught in the crossfire. While you can’t always control how your friends might behave while traveling, you can control yourself.
Be sure to make it clear what you want to do. Avoid being that person who doesn’t express an opinion at all. Then you’ll end up resentful of the people who seem to be making all of the decisions. Even if you don’t get your way in the end, you will at least have made your preferences known. At the same time, don’t be too rigid and uptight. Traveling with friends can force you outside your comfort zone and make you experience new things that you actually wind up enjoying. Find that careful balance of not being too laid-back or too opinionated.
Set Aside Some ‘Me’ Time
When it comes to knowing how to travel with friends the right way, it’s important to note that it can be exhausting being around the same people from the minute you wake up until the minute you go to bed. Before you get to your destination, be sure that everyone is going to have their “me” time. Breaks from the group can be restorative and can be a healthy component to traveling with friends.
One great way of overcoming conflicts about who wants to see and do what is to set aside blocks of time for everyone to break off and do stuff on their own. One person wants to check out that one great museum they’ve been dying to visit. Someone else just wants to sit in a café and write postcards. Other want to go to the beach, or the casino, or to ride an elevator to the top of the tallest building in the city. Clearly, not everyone is going to enjoy all of these activities. Plus, when you all get back together, you’ll have that much more to talk about based on your solo adventures.
Don’t Make Decisions When You’re Stressed or Hungry
Traveling is never without its inconveniences. Whether you’re waiting for a delayed flight or a tour you booked months ago is inexplicably cancelled, things can sometimes go wrong on your trip. During stressful times like this, it’s important to maintain a cool head and not to make any big decisions. More often than not, stress puts people on edge, turning the tiniest of disagreements into cause for a full-blown shouting match. Similarly, low blood sugar can make people grouchy in a condition many call being “hangry.”
Rather than risking a heated argument, in moments like these it’s paramount that you and your friends take a breather before figuring out what you want to do next. Sit down at a café or sandwich shop and recharge your mental batteries. Once you’re replenished, you and your friends will look at your situation with new eyes. Then you’ll be ready to tackle the next stage in your adventure as a team.
Decide How to Split Meals Ahead of Time
Figuring out how to split the bill when you’re eating out can often be a big question, especially on a friend-cation. Groups of friends often have varying income levels, which could potentially make things awkward when the check comes. Deciding how you want to split the cost of meals beforehand cuts down on all the confusion. That way, you and your friends can enjoy your vacation without worrying that you’ve made your besties feel uncomfortable.
Generally, travel experts recommend two ways to divide the bill at meals: splitting the check and separating the check. Splitting the check calls for each diner to pay an equal amount of the bill plus tips. On the other hand, separating the check has each diner paying only for the food and drink they personally ordered at the meal. Since some restaurants don’t allow customers to split the bill, one person may choose to pay for the entire meal while everyone else reimburses them later or via payment app No matter how you decide to split the cost, figuring it out ahead of time is essential.
Make a Social Media Policy
Social media is a great way to keep in touch with your family and friends and store your most important memories. But it can be difficult to fully immerse yourself in your environment when you’re looking at your phone all the time or are trying to document every move that you and your group make. Having a social media policy for your trip keeps you in the moment, even if you might be a little late to the newest trend.
Likewise, while some of your friends might be very active on social media, others might place a high value on their privacy. Before setting out on your big adventure, make sure everyone in your group is okay with having their picture posted to social media. And, also ask them whether or not they’d like to be tagged in status updates. These little steps are more than just a courtesy. Being mindful of your friends’ privacy will help everyone feel comfortable and enjoy their vacation.
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Make Room for Spontaneity
Yes, having an itinerary is an essential part of any vacation. But leaving a few free moments here and there allows you to really appreciate your destination while bonding with your nearest and dearest. Talking to a hotel concierge is a great way to hone in on attractions that are off the beaten path. And, they’ll help you learn more about nearby, authentic experiences that have a local flavor. Whether you and your pals decide to visit a historic site that travel guides overlook or you want to take a last-minute kayaking tour, spontaneous excursions make your trip an adventure full of possibility and the unexpected.
Are you a seasoned expert on friend trips? What other tips would you add to the list for a successful getaway? Share your ideas with us in the comments below.
